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AMONG OTHER THINGS: Charley was a prophet

by Paul Fugleberg
| May 1, 2014 2:23 PM

An old adage proclaims “The more things change, the more they stay the same.” It must be pretty accurate.

Thirty years ago, in January 1984, this column featured a fictional conversation with an equally fictional character named Crow Creek Charley, a hermit who came out of the mountains at the start of each year. As was his custom, Charley was known for his predictions of what the new year would bring. He had this to say about 1984:

“No great changes. Unrest in the Middle East, and if there aren’t disastrous floods in the Mid-west or Europe, there’ll be plenty of ‘em someplace else – and volcanic eruptions, earthquakes, new threats of famine, epidemics, tragic fires, tornados, wars and rumors of wars, political turbulence and rebellions.”

“Well, Charley,” I started to ask. “What about …”

“Don’t interrupt, Buster. I’m on a roll now. I figure we’ll continue to try to pare down our military capability – while some Russian politicians are saber-rattling about a renewed Soviet empire and expansion, and North Korea toys with possible nuclear weapons production, Iran and Iraq maintain their mad at the U.S. and Israel, drug abuse spreads…”

“I know, Charley, but there are some good things…

“I told you, don’t butt in. It ain’t polite. Let me finish. There’s gonna be trouble in the African nations; in our own country, there’ll be more random shootings in offices, schools, airports, neighborhoods; you’ll hear of new incidents of greed-based financial finagling in which innocent citizens lose their life savings or investments.”

“Aw, lighten up, Charley; after all, it’s an election year. Maybe we’ll get new ideas and solutions.”

That was a poor choice of words. On the verge of apoplexy, Crow Creek Charley retorted, “That’s part of the problem. Legislative candidates will be out in force. Some things never change and politics is one. The trouble with legislatures and Congress is more than the politicians; it’s their gullible constituents!”

“Listen, Charley, it can’t be all that bad.”

“Oh, I admit there’s gonna be a lot of good things happening: Big breakthroughs in biotechnology, tele-communications, rapid transportation, medical research, health care and treatment, things that should enhance the standard of living. After all, look at what we’ve done with dandruff control, bad breath, stripes in toothpaste, rebuilding telescopes in outer space.”

“There, that’s more like it,” I told him.

“Yeah, but these things are too little and to no avail, if people let the dark side of human nature prevail.”

“Gee, Charley, that’s sounds poetic.”

“It could be verse,” he quipped.

I helped him pack supplies in his dilapidated Model A pickup. Then, as he climbed in, he gave this parting shot:

“The trouble with the world is people – yup, me included, We got the message some 2,000 years ago about treating one another as we’d like to be treated. But too many of us haven’t been listening. Well, see you next year, Buster, if we last that long – and if gas prices aren’t too high.”